Know.it.all? Nah~

"My heart can't possibly break when it's not even whole to start with" 
- Kelly Clarkson [Because of you]

OMG, how long has it been since I've last updated? Few days? Okay, anyway I've gotten myself purple highlights on my fringe, an add-on to my already reddish-brownish hair with my black roots growing. WTF, not to miss out, some white hairs here and there. White hairs, migraines, sensitive nose... I've inherited all of them from my mum. Fuck. Why don't she pass to me her good genes like big eyes?! OTL

Anyw, my selfies for the day~ I know I look shitty, just scroll down if it's bothering you. Heh. XP

Anyw, yea.. I've realised many people hasn't figured out what kind of person I am regardless how much I've blog or told them.
Well... these are what I've always gotten from people around me.

My personality:
1. I'm naive. Yes. I am. Fuck. I simply believe everything you said so long as you sound and looked convincing.
2. I have trust issues. Okay, contradicting, yea? I don't trust people easily, but when you earned my trust, you earned all of it.
3. I'm a paranoid bitch. E.g. I'd worried about friends leaving me etc, probably because too many did.
4. I believe in everything. I believe in aliens, monsters, angels, god, miracles. Whatever you name it.
5. I believe in fairytales. Not that Cinderella exist. -.- I believe in them as in that there'll be "happily ever after" etc.
6. I'm family orientated. Family comes first for me. Regardless what it is. But surely, there'll be times friends would but yea..
7. I'm denial. When I insist on something being true or etc, even if it's not, I'll find all sorts of excuses. Heh. XP
8. I'm fucking competitive. Unless it's something meaningless or it's more beneficial for me to lose than win.
9. I'm independent yet not. I've always been independent since probably around 4? So if I'm with people at my age, I'm more like the adult. However, with people who are older or mature than I am, I'll be like a kid. Hahas.
10. I have lots of aegyo. But my aegyo ... you'll only understand it is if you know me for long time. It's not obvious or what to those who doesn't know me well.
11. I'm a daddy girl, a mommy boy. Most of the time.
12. I'm boyish yet girlish. At certain times, I'm like guys. I have the 'heck care' attitude of most guys' and the way they talk or behave, I have some of them. Yet, I'm like a normal girl, dressing up, shopping etc.
13. I'm fucking indulged in kpop. Don't thrash them if you don't want me to reply you with insults.
14. I can be fucking mean and vulgar etc. Look at my past posts. Which of them doesn't have a vulgarity in them. I bet none. And I've gotten the sarcasm in me from my mum.
15. I'm insensitive. Well, to be more exact, I don't think through before saying anything sometimes. So.. sometimes whatever I said turned out to be more hurtful than I wanted it to be.
16. I've bad temper and I'm bossy. This, I have no explanation for it. That's just me.
17. I'm very soft-hearted. I cry when I watch shows about poor elderly living alone etc. No joke.
18. I cry very easily. Reading fanfics, watching movie/dramas etc, if I'm into it, prepare boxes of tissues. ^^

When I...:
say I don't know - depends on the convo. sometimes I said that because I'm too ... shy(?) to express what I really want to say. E.g. if you ask me "like/love him" and I'd answer "don't know.." when it fact, hell yeah, I do. And/or it's just I'm too lazy/can't be bothered to reply. Sometimes, it's that I don't get what you're saying. It all depends on the convo.
say nothing when asked about something - it either shows I'm fed up with you not knowing what I wanna say or I'm to lazy to explain or I meant it.
say it's okay - sometimes it's not. Look at my tone and messages, are they the way usual way I use when talking to you or not?
stare into space - most of the time, there's many things going on in my mind. Snap me out of it. Most of the time, there's so many things that I just decide to stare into the space blankly thinking about nothing. Snap me out of it, it's one of my not-obvious way of calling for help that there's so many things bothering me.
stares at my phone - I'm waiting for someone to text (duh) or I'm awkward to be in the situation or I'm bored
lost appetite - fuck, it's a serious thing. I'm either sick or something is really bothering me. For someone like me to not want to eat, it has to be something serious.
got hyper/high - don't be surprise. I'm always acting as if I'm on drugs, getting high out of nowhere suddenly. It's either because I'm trying to make things less awkward or it's simply that I'm out of my mind or that so many things are bothering me that I'm letting things out in my way.
got touchy/a lot of skinship - don't be shocked. I love skinships actually. Just that am I close enough with you to act that way or not and that if I'm shy (?) or not. Heh

That's all. I guess? Can't remember the rest. will update when I remember the rest. ^^

Live to the Fullest

"You only live once. It's either you live your dreams or just dream living it."
- Ven

OMG. I'm so gonna go bankrupt soon!!! T.T Here's the reason why:

1. 2NE1 world tour in Singapore (Confirmed - 4th April)
2. EXO's comeback in March (according to M! Countdown website & twitter)
3. SM TOWN in Singapore (TBC)
4. YG Family Concert in Singapore (TBC)
5. EXO's Asia Tour (TBC)
6. SHINee's Fanmeet in Singapore (TBC)

WHATTTTT?!?!?!?!? OMG, I'm gonna go bankrupt especially when I'm starting Poly soon. OTL Whatever, I'm gonna go for which ever events I can go and buy whichever album of my bias if I can. And I wanna go Korea. OMG. It's all so fucked up. Argh, whatever, screw 'em.

And I'm thinking of dye-ing my hair the same as Baek's during Wolf era. The maroon/purple one. Probably gonna do it for CNY~ hehehe. Many 'what if's came into my mind but screw 'em, YOLO, y' know! ^^

I've forgotten what I wanna post. So I'd just end here. If I happened to remember, I'll post it. XP

bye

First Love

"It has became a habit of mine to let go of those whom I loved and cherished,
fearing they would let go of me someday.
It's a scary habit that protected me even during my downs."
- Ven

OMG. So sorry. Well.... so much as been going on these days. And yep, as you can see on my title and my info section, I'm attached. Heh. Well, actually we both admit it's a lil' hasty for us to get together 'cause we just got to know each other this year. As in literally, 2014. Yea, we do see each other sometimes because he works next door as a chef, I guess. I'm not really good with names of occupations etc. Whatever. Anyway, and 'cause our workplace are under the same company, we shared the kitchen so we would bump into each other sometimes. (not literally but yea..) However, we never talked much. Probably just saying 'hi' etc.

Some of my friends told me it'll be a risk. I know. Being the person whom I am, I fell in love. Hahahs. But I am happy with him, it's just that there'll be a moment or two whereby I'd wanna kill him. Esp when he tease me about me on diet. Argh. This annoying fella! Anyw, he's my first boyfriend and so am I his first girlfriend. (that's what his friend and him said). And being together only for few days, we managed to date though. Hahahs. We would wait for each other (mostly him waiting for me) before we would head home. He would always send me home before going home on his home. However, the direction to his home and mine is a complete different direction which meant he is always taking a detour. >.<

He's always being all nice to me etc. Hahahahas. Which is good, I guess? And everyone p, the chefs and service crews etc, knows about our relationship, OMG. So I'd be teased whenever they see us together or something. Like eg yesterday he walked by our kitchen 'cause he needs to go to the freezer to get something, and I happened to be in the kitchen too so we smiled to each other. Than, my manager and colleagues were like "eyyyyy, no flirting!!!" Hahahahahas.

Anyw, I told my mum about us, and she said because I'm her daughter, there isn't anyway for her not to be judgmental, but she's trying, I guess, not to be. Whatever it is, we're together now, it's all that matters, isn't it? Hahahahahs.

Anyw. I've gotten back my O level results, I got 14 for L1R2B2. Heh. B3 for English, A1 for Chinese, A2 for Combined Science, B3 for Combined Humanities and C5 for Math (fuck). So yep... hopefully I'm able to enter the course I wanted to go... /pray hard/

That's all for now. Bye~

Expect the worst and not the best.

Don't get your hopes high if you can't stand disappointments.
The higher your hopes, the greater the disappointment.
- Ven.

OMG, haven't been updating at all!!! T.T Had been working literally everyday since 31st Dec. Was supposed to have an off-day on Sunday but I went to my aunt's to work. And finally, I'll be having off-days for 3 days, using excuse of poly open house and on release of results day. Oh well~ there's additional $2/hr everyday now, so why not? Hahahas. But it's freaking tiring to be standing and talking the whole day thou I love to talk. But hey, talking at work and with friends is totally different! OMG. And you've no idea how much I hate some of the people I met (mostly customers). But, I've met some really nice people too! ^^ Like the part-timers of my age from next door, some chefs and etc. Heh.

My manager is nice... but... her mood swings are scary. In one moment, she can be joking around with you etc and the next - after making a slight mistake - she'll be ignoring your presence and shows a stern expression. As for my supervisor... she's pretty nice but she's kinda bossy - that's what we all (the staffs) agreed on. Hahs. And as for the other part-timers.. the guys are nice. I guess? They'll help out if you ever need help, but one of them (there's 2 male part-timers) can be annoying and childish that I suspect he has the mentality age of a 7's.

My supervisor is nice. Just that... she's really strict. And she nags, a lot. Hahahahas. But she is someone that you can look for when in need of advice. I guess?

Well, there's one more female part-timer. And no, not the type of friends I'd be close with. Probably just talk and etc, but not totally close. So yea... there's 2 male ones, but I've never really befriended with them. Probably just colleagues that would joke around with each other? Hahahas.

So yea, here's my worklife. OTL